When The Storm Whispers
January 2019 I wake up feeling like the world has collapsed on my chest. It hurts, but tears just simply won't come. If it could, my heart just wanted to explode out of its cavity. It has been more than a year since my hysterectomy. Most of the time, I have accepted the fact that I would never have children on my own. I am fine with that. I have a life that I love, surrounded by beauty: beautiful people, beautiful children, beautiful music/art, and beautiful nature. I have nothing to complain about. However, this morning everything comes down crashing. I just had a dream that I was five months pregnant. I was so excited that a miracle had happened, only for it to shatter as soon as I open my eyes. The pain is unbearable. It is a Saturday, which is a "good" day to have a bad mood, because I don't have to deal with work. I don't have to force myself to smile or be upbeat for my students. I don't have to think how to make them understand a ce